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Selling Life Insurance

Private Jones was assigned to the Army induction center, where he was to advise new recruits about their government benefits, especially their Serviceman's Group Life Insurance (SGLI). It wasn't long before the center's Lieutenant noticed that Private Jones had almost a 100% record for insurance sales, which had never happened before. Rather than ask about this, the Lt. stood in the back of the room and listened to Jones's sales pitch.

Jones explained the basics of the SGLI to the new recruits, and then said. "If you have SGLI and go into battle and are killed, the government has to pay $200,000 to your beneficiaries. If you don't have SGLI, and you go into battle and get killed, the government has to pay only a maximum of $6000."

"Now," he concluded, "which bunch do you think they are going to send into battle first?"

Top 10 Viagra Slogans


* Viagra, The quicker dicker upper

* Viagra, One-a-day, like iron

* Viagra, When it absolutely, positively has to be there tonight

* Viagra, Home of the whopper

* Viagra, It plumps when you take 'em

* Viagra, Strong enough for a man, but made for a woman

* Viagra, Tastes great, more filling

* Viagra, Ten inches long ... and growing.

* Viagra, We work harder, so you don't have to.

* This is your penis. This is your penis on drugs. Any questions?

17 Parrots

An american, a russian, and a dane was discussing the differences between their countries. Pretty soon the general talking turned into general bragging about how terrific their respective countries where.

The Russian said, "Our navy is so big, that if we all sailed out at once, it would cover every ocean in the world."

The American, not wanting to let the Russian get the better of him, continued, "Well, our Air Force is so big that if all of our planes took off at once we could cover the sky all over the world."

The Dane thought for a while then said: "I once new a guy in Odense whose dick was so long that 17 parrots could sit on it at once."

They stood for a while not saying anything, until the Russian decided he might modify his bold statement a bit, "Well maybe the ships wouldn't cover ALL of the ocean."

The American, feeling the need for honesty as well said, "Well, maybe the planes wouldn't cover all of the sky either I guess."

The Dane stood there for a while thinking, and finally said, "Well, in all honesty the guy I knew might have lived a bit outside Odense actually."

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